Chocolate Milk Brands Ranked From Worst To Best

If you adore chocolate milk, you have Jamaicans to thank. Locals on the island were making a similar drink in the 1400s, and a man named Sir Hans Sloane returned to Europe from Jamaica in the 1700s with cocoa, milk, and the knowledge of how to mix the two ingredients. It didn't take long for chocolate milk to rise to prominence. These days, you can go to your local grocery store and find a number of different brands in the dairy section.

While most chocolate milk looks the same, the taste and consistency can vary widely. If you select the right brand, your taste buds will thank you as you celebrate this drink's rich, chocolatey goodness. However, if you choose poorly, the disappointment you feel could ruin your entire day.

Don't leave your future up to chance. In this ranking, we've listed chocolate milk brands, beginning with the brands that deserve to be at the bottom of the barrel.

While there are definitely some Great Value items that you shouldn't buy, that's not always the case with this Walmart brand. Sometimes you can find Great Value items that are, well, a great value and provide an impressive amount of bang for your buck. Unfortunately, that's not true with regard to Great Value Chocolate Milk. This stuff is just bad and should be avoided.

Like Nesquik Chocolate Lowfat Milk, Walmart's store brand of chocolate milk is too sweet. While not quite as sweet as Nesquik's version, it's a close call. The good news is that Great Value Chocolate Milk doesn't have any grittiness. The bad news is that it's really, really thin.

Top-notch chocolate milk has an alluring thickness about it. Great Value's version is almost like water. What's wrong with it? Part of the issue is that Walmart uses one percent milk. Using low fat milk usually results in a lack of thickness — and that's certainly the case with this stuff.

When it comes to almond milk, Almond Breeze is one of the two brands that you can always trust. There's nothing wrong with the quality of the products — and that holds true for Almond Breeze Chocolate Almondmilk. This stuff is the best chocolate almond milk you can find. That said, you shouldn't buy it.

The problem isn't with Almond Breeze — the problem is with almond milk. Although almond milk is a little bit thicker than water, it's still really thin. It also doesn't have a naturally smooth texture like other types of non-dairy milk. The only good trait that almond milk can boast when it comes to chocolate milk is that almond milk is great about not getting in the way. You can put almond milk in anything and it will gladly play a supporting role, which is the leading reason why it's the most popular non-dairy milk.

Almond Breeze Chocolate Almondmilk has a satisfying chocolate flavor. Sadly, the lack of smoothness and the fact that it's so thin makes this chocolate milk impossible to recommend.

Finding Kirkland Signature products at Costco that are actually superior to name brand products is actually easy to do. When in doubt, saving money and going with Kirkland Signature is usually a really safe idea. At worst, the product you buy will usually be equal to what you'd get by picking the name brand. Disappointingly, Kirkland Signature Organic Reduced Fat Chocolate Milk doesn't live up to those expectations. This chocolate milk is definitely below average.

The texture of the milk is the first issue, although that's not too much of a surprise, since it uses reduced fat milk and not whole milk. The second issue is the main reason why you wouldn't buy this stuff a second time. While it's more chocolatey than TruMoo Chocolate Whole Milk, the chocolate taste is still underwhelming. In fact, the milk flavor is stronger than the chocolate flavor.

What's extra disappointing is the fact that we know Costco is capable of making great chocolate products. Their All American Chocolate Cake was one of the best chocolate desserts of all-time. While it's now discontinued, that cake was a chocolate lover's dream.

Whole Foods has a lot of great dairy and dairy-like products that you should buy including organic milk, various non-dairy milk options, and yogurt that is made out of almond milk. That means that their chocolate milk should also be excellent, right? Unfortunately, that's not the case. Whole Foods 365 Chocolate Milk is average-ish, but there's nothing notable about it.

This chocolate milk has a rich chocolate taste, but it uses low fat milk, so the consistency of it is a bit of a letdown. If you're thirsty, this stuff is a good choice because you can quickly gulp it down. Otherwise keep reading this ranking and pick a brand that is higher on the list.

Whole Foods 365 Chocolate Milk also loses some points due to its inflated price tag. Whole Foods has been given the nickname Whole Paycheck because of the proven fact that their products tend to cost more. This drink is decent and won't put a frown on your face — but it also isn't worthy of a recommendation.

Based in Ancramdale, New York, Ronnybrook offers a variety of top-of-the line dairy products including butter, ice cream, yogurt, and even creme fraiche. While their prices aren't for the squeamish, the luxurious quality of their products will never cease to amaze. For example, Ronnybrook Egg Nog is some of the very best store-bought eggnog that can be found anywhere in the United States. Their eggnog is thick and the flavor is perfect.

While Ronnybrook Creamline Chocolate Milk is good, it's not for everyone and it's not for every occasion. This stuff is for those who love extra creamy chocolate milk. If this chocolate milk was any thicker, it would have to be classified as chocolate pudding. This drink is a great choice if you want to fill a glass and slowly sip it over the course of an hour. But if you're running short on time, the thickness can actually become an annoyance.

Admittedly, Yoo-hoo Chocolate Drink being in the top five of this chocolate milk ranking may cause a bit of controversy. It legally can't advertise itself as chocolate milk because there's actually no milk in it. Yoo-hoo is also viewed by many as a drink for children or those with an underdeveloped palate. However, based on taste alone, this stuff is excellent. It might not officially be chocolate milk, but your taste buds won't complain about that technicality.

The key to Yoo-hoo is to make sure that it's really cold. If you let this chocolate drink approach anywhere close to room temperature, the flavor goes downhill quickly. At it's best, Yoo-hoo is sweet (but not too sweet) and its chocolatey goodness simply can't be denied.

While this drink doesn't have milk in it, it should be noted that it's not dairy-free. It has ingredients in it that are derived from milk, including whey and sodium caseinate.

The best reduced fat chocolate milk is Fairlife Chocolate Milk, and it's not even a close contest. This stuff is made with two percent milk that has been ultra-filtered. Amazingly, despite not using whole milk, it's thick and feels silky smooth in your mouth. Not only does this drink have less fat than traditional chocolate milk, it also has half the sugar, more calcium, and more protein. In fact, it has more protein per serving (13 grams) than the Horizon Organic High Protein Reduced Fat Chocolate Milk that was mentioned above.

When it comes to its chocolatiness, Fairlife Chocolate Milk is also a showstopper. Its chocolate flavor is deep and rich enough to make your eyes roll with ecstasy. The aftertaste is also quite impressive.

The Fairlife product would be even higher in this ranking — however, some customers lost confidence in the company in 2019 when animal abuse was allegedly caught on tape at one of their dairy farms.

Promised Land Midnight Chocolate Whole Milk is so good that it will be a shock to your senses and will turn your whole chocolate-loving world upside down. Until you drink this stuff, you won't even realize that it's possible for chocolate milk to taste this good. One sip is all it will take and you too will join the boisterous chorus of loyalists that call this drink the best of the best.

While this chocolate milk is more expensive than Trader Joe's store brand, your taste buds will deem it a worthy investment. Decadent is the best word to explain what Promised Land Midnight Chocolate Whole Milk tastes like. This drink is rich, chocolatey, and deeply delicious from the moment it first enters your lips until the last moment of the aftertaste. The chocolate milk is so tasty that the fact that its thickness and texture are also pristine will be lost in the shuffle. Buy it once and you'll never willfully settle for another brand ever again.