Why The Internet Is Mad At Chrissy Teigen's Girl Scout Cookie Ranking
So Chrissy Teigen went on Twitter and posted an opinion about something — because that's pretty much what Chrissy does, she has opinions and she shares them, and for the most part, everybody loves her for it. Oops, not this time. It seems Chrissy has finally taken on too sacred of a cow — she dared to diss the almighty Girl Scout cookie.
She wasn't really all that harsh — all she did was share that Girl Scout Cookies aren't all that and didn't go overboard comparing them to desiccated sewage sludge or compressed rodent feces or even the cliched "tastes like cardboard." In fact, she didn't use any words at all to describe her feelings, instead she ranked the cookies using a chart with smiley, meh, and frowny faces.
How Chrissy rated the Girl Scout cookies
Chrissy's original rankings had all six cookies she tested — Samoas, Trefoils, Tagalongs, S'mores, and Thin Mints (both frozen and unfrozen, so these count twice) — lined up under the frowny face. She captioned the post, "I did the ranking you're all too scared to do," but quickly found out why nobody else dares to suggest that Girl Scout cookies are less than wonderful.
Once the Twitter freakout began, she re-did her ranking system as "if NO other cookies in the world existed," and the results were slightly improved for some cookies. The S'mores and Tagalongs remained in the yuck column, the regular Thin Mints and Trefoils were upgraded to so-so, and frozen Thin Mints and Samoas both moved all the way up to somewhere between the meh and smiley faces, so basically rated as "just okay."
What Twitter had to say about it
A few commenters were so bold as to concur with Chrissy, albeit in a somewhat understated way, with Tweets such as "we would get along," "Girl Scout cookies are ALL hype," and "Agreed. Spot on!" The rest of the Twitterverse, however, most definitely got their panties in a bunch about Chrissy's rankings, even the 2.0 version.
They immediately started tweeting out such horrified denials as, "Chrissy I love you but I disagree SO strongly," "this list needs s'more updating because it is whack," "Never knew someone could be so wrong about something," and "You're crazy girl." One particular cookie seemed to have a particularly vocal — and upset — fan base amongst the Twitterati: "How dare you insult my tagalongs!!", "How can you do Tagalongs so dirty?", "There will be no Tagalong slanderrrrrr!!!!", and "Your tagalong ranking has seriously put a damper on our relationship. I'm going to need some time and space to think this all through."
To those rampant defenders of the consecrated cookie, we say: get some perspective. At least Chrissy still eats cookies. You want to hate on someone, go ask Gwyneth Paltrow how she feels about Girl Scout cookies. And when you do, please let the rest of us know, since that's bound to be a fun showdown.