Taco Bell Is Making Food Recommendations Based On Your Zodiac Sign

The universe, apparently, has nothing better to do than to use the stars and planets to send you messages about how to organize every last detail about your life – kind of like an overbearing parent combined with Siri, only a lot more cryptic. If you're already letting your horoscope tell you who you should date, what color lipstick to wear and what cocktail to drink on that date, and what to name your babies when that match made in the heavens works out as it was fated to do, then you should probably consult your star chart to determine what to have for dinner, as well.

Even when you're in the mood for fast food (it's not just an Aries thing!), the alignment of the stars might have a thing or two to say here, too. In fact, if you want to eat at Taco Bell, you no longer need to wonder what the stars have intended you to order. A crack team of astrologers (or a corporate social media manager) has taken to Twitter to inform you not only of the appropriate menu item for your sun sign but of the sides and condiments that best match your rising and moon signs as well.

Fire signs like to keep things crunchy

Taco Bell's Twitter has peered into its crystal ball (oops, are we mixing our prognosticative metaphors?) and if you're a fire sign, they foresee a lot of crunching in your future. If you're an Aries, they say you should be ordering a Crunchy Taco, while if you're a Leo, a Crunchwrap Supreme should be your go-to order. As for Sagittarians, you guys were born to eat Cheesy Gordita Crunches.

An Aries Moon means a packet of Fire! sauce (take several, they're small), while an Aries Rising sign means you should get a Spicy Potato Taco on the side. If your moon is in Leo, better make it Diablo sauce, and anyone with Leo Rising should get their paws on some Nacho Fries before they go away (and come back, and go away, and come back again). Sagittarius Moon? Better get a Baja Blast Freeze. Sagittarius Rising, however, means a Bean Burrito should be your go-to side.

Earth signs tend to be hearty eaters

If you're a Taurus, you basically like food. Lots of food. Go ahead and order the Chicken Quesadilla, as Taco Bell's Twitter thinks you should, although you'll probably like everything else on the menu, too. If you're a Virgo, you tend to be a bit finickier, but you'll probably like the Nachos Bellgrande, since why wouldn't you? If you're a Capricorn, though, Taco Bell thinks you should go for something big and beefy: the Beefy 5-Layer Burrito.

Moon in Taurus means you're likely to enjoy a Blue Raspberry Lemonade Freeze, while a Virgo Moon suggests a Mild sauce packet. Capricorn? You get a packet of Hot sauce. Taurus Rising equates to a side of Chips and Nacho Cheese Sauce, while Virgo Risings get a Quesarito and Capricorn Rising means you were meant to be eating Cheesy Fiesta Potatoes. Good thing those are back on the menu! Otherwise, you'd have to DIY your own.

Air signs always enjoy trying new things

Air signs are the most open-minded of the entire zodiac (no, we're not calling you airheads!), so your menu choices are all over the map. Gemini? Taco Bell Twitter says the Burrito Supreme. Libra? Soft Taco Supreme. Aquarius? Surprise, your star sign's order does not have the word "supreme: in its name. Instead, the Power Menu Bowl with its chicken, rice, guac, and black beans suits your sign right down to the ground.

A Gemini Moon, for reasons best known to Taco Bell, means you're bound to love their Wild Strawberry Lemonade Freeze, while a Libra Moon means you should get ... uh, reduced-fat sour cream. (Luckily that goes with just about everything on Taco Bell's menu.) If you have an Aquarius Moon, then you + Baja Blast were meant to be. As far as your rising sign sides go, Gemini Rising means Cinnabon Delights, Libra Rising gets you Cinnamon Twists (well, that and $1 or so), and Aquarius Rising evidently equates to love for Nacho Cheese Doritos Locos Tacos (although everybody else loves those, too).

Sorry, water signs, Taco Bell doesn't do seafood

Water signs are, as their element implies, very fond of fish and shellfish, but Taco Bell has never really gone the fish taco route and only occasionally experiments with limited-time shrimp offerings. For you, water signs, Taco Bell's Twitter has some alternate suggestions. If you're a Cancer, they think you'll like the Chalupa Supreme. If you're a Scorpio, the Black Bean Chalupa will suit your mysterious nature, and if you're a Pisces, you'll want to dive right into some Loaded Taco Fries.

A Cancer Moon, according to Taco Bell, indicates a secret (or not-so-secret) passion for guacamole, while a Wild Strawberry Freeze suits a Scorpion Moon. If your moon is in Pisces, you should get ... a cup of water? Seriously, that's what they say. (At least it won't break the bank.) Rising sign sides look a bit more promising: Black Beans and Rice for Cancer Rising, Cheesy Bean and Rice Burrito for Scorpio Rising, and a Cheese Quesadilla for Pisces Rising.