People Are Calling Foul On This Strange Uncrustables Flavor
Whenever new products hit the grocery store shelves, it's always kind of exciting, since so many of these items are things that quickly make us wonder how we ever lived without them. Everything seasoning! Hot honey pizza! Ice cream bars you can eat for breakfast! Some products, though, you've just got to wonder: What was the R&D team thinking when they dreamed up that one? Citrus-flavored fizzy milk (Coke's long-forgotten Vio), purple ketchup (EZ Squirt), Pepsi the color of Ty-D-Bol ... yeah, some products have "future fail" written all over them.
Add one more to the list. Who on earth thought that what the world needs now is a mashup of tacos and Uncrustables? Yes, Uncrustables, those frozen, crust-free round sandwiches, brought to you by peanut butter and jelly makers Smuckers. The original PB&J version of the Uncrustable kind of makes sense, if you (or your 2-year-old) hate crust more than you mind a little sogginess, and this product does have its fan base. Still, Smuckers really needs to stick to what it knows best, and tacos ain't it. Needless to say, Twitter's reactions to Uncrustables Taco Bites range from the amused to the downright horrified.
Twitter gives a thumbs-down
When one sharp-eyed shopper posted a pic on Twitter of this odd product, they captioned it: "the situation has worsened." The rest of the Twitterverse couldn't help but agree. While a few admitted that they might be willing to try them, most comments were along the lines of "New year, new hell," "is this God smiting us?" and "Has science gone too far?" One person said "I just wanna know how that meeting at smuckers went down and what poor souls tested these things before they went onto shelves," while several wondered if the product was an extremely down-market version of an empanada or even Nebraska's beloved runza. One commenter spoke to the product's essential absurdity by saying "i, too, like to get my mexican-inspired foodstuffs from a brand most known for jellies and jams."
While some reasonably speculated that Uncrustables Taco Bites might find a market with stoners and/or drunks, one Twitter user admitted that they'd tried these while intoxicated and still found them to be "awful..mostly air with a small bit of meat that absolutely does not taste like taco meat." Bagel Bites and pizza rolls, have no fear: Taco Bites are not about to take your place in the pantheon of foods best eaten under the influence.
Those who've tried them don't like them, either
While most of the tweeting was from those who'd never tried the product and had no intention of doing so, The Impulsive Buy's reviewer was actually brave enough to ingest a few bites of a Taco Bite Uncrustable. They reviewed both Uncrustables meat items, the BBQ Chicken Bites and the Taco Bites. While the BBQ chicken, it turns out, is relatively palatable, particularly when you keep in mind that it is essentially "kid food" (meaning the "BBQ" sauce is definitely on the sweet side), the Taco Bites ... not so much. In fact, not at all.
As the review described the experience –- or rather, the ordeal –- of eating a Taco Bite, it "was like biting into a black hole." While the seasoned "beef crumble" filling itself didn't actually taste all that bad for such a dubiously-named ingredient, the reviewer had to peel off the breading to be able to taste it at all. They found the meat to be completely overwhelmed by the dry, spongy "uncrust" that seemed to absorb every bit of the alleged taco flavor. So yes, it seems that Smuckers has come up with yet another product you never knew you needed ... and never will, because you don't.