The Refill Habit Servers Wish You'd Stop Doing

Restaurant and bar etiquette rules are often established for a reason. They help diners avoid being the type of customer that makes waitstaff cringe, and provide structure to a restaurant's daily operations. One etiquette rule that applies to full-service restaurants pertains to refills of your water glass throughout the meal. If you want to make pouring refills easier for your server (and stay dry), keep your glass on the table when the water pitcher or coffee pot comes around.

It's tempting to hold up your cup for a refill when you see the server approaching, especially if you're in the corner of a crowded booth. Don't do it. If the cup happens to slip out of your hand while they're pouring, or the server can't tell when it's full because of the angle you're holding it at, you risk getting covered in water (or worse, coffee).

The best move is to just leave the cup or glass where it is on the table. This allows the server to pour while it's sturdy on a flat surface, and it gives them a good view of the inside so they don't overfill it. If the server can't easily reach your cup, simply hand it to them so they can refill it from a closer distance.

Even if you keep your cup on the table when requesting a refill and are nothing but polite with waitstaff, there are other dining behaviors that signal poor restaurant etiquette — whether you realize it or not. For example, let's say the dish that arrived at your table didn't fully deliver. Maybe you got the wrong order, or the food isn't prepared to your liking. It's acceptable (and even important) to let your server know, but they (and kitchen staff) will be annoyed if you do it at the end of your meal. Instead of eating first and complaining later, it's best to let your waiter know as soon as possible if there's a problem.

Respect for servers extends beyond individual interactions, too. The United States has a culture of tipping in restaurants, and to tip well, the standard is 20%. Servers notice: "If non-tippers, or cheap tippers have any frequency in any place, eventually they'll know who you are," wrote one Reddit user on r/Waiters, adding, "You'll get bare minimum from servers."

Tipping is one way of showing respect to waiters, and another is taking your garbage with you. Garbage created from the meal itself — like straw wrappers or butter packets — is fine, but it's bad form to leave other trash behind. This is especially true if it's something personal, like used tissues, chewed gum, or anything else someone shouldn't have to clean up after you leave.