The Hilarious Confession Martha Stewart Made About Her Dating Life

"What does a woman want?" Sigmund Freud once mused (per Johns Hopkins Press). Whether he was sincere or not, we've got some answers. Perhaps more specifically, what does a successful, attractive 80-year-old woman with a net worth of $400 million named Martha Stewart want? She seems to have it all: an incredible range of talents — from gardening to horseback riding – and tremendous business success (plus a great Instagram page, including fan-favorite cocktail selfies).

But she's still looking for love, more than 30 years after her divorce from Andrew Stewart. She recently dished about her love life with Chelsea Handler on "Dear Chelsea" (per People), confessing to having had two whole crushes in the past month. But her bubble burst when she discovered one of the men was actually married to a friend's mother; such a shame since he was "so attractive."

She and Chelsea agreed that dating married men (however attractive) was a clear no-fly zone. But Stewart couldn't help mentioning that a wedding ring hadn't stopped some men from expressing interest, noting that she has been offered the "opportunity to be a home-wrecker" — an offer she politely declined, though she didn't specify how many times (via Vanity Fair). But that can't stop a girl from wishing that one of her (not so close) friends might just happen to die suddenly and leave her husband a widower. As Martha put it, "​​I always just think, 'Oh, gosh. Couldn't that person just die?' Not painfully. Just die."

So many men, so little time

Don't misunderstand Martha Stewart, it's not that she wants to see anyone suffer. It's just that it's so hard to meet other men. As she noted to Chelsea Handler, "[T]hat's where I meet men. They're all married to friends of mine or something like that." (via Yahoo)

It's natural that she would share her thoughts with Handler as they've enjoyed a rapport ever since a sexy poolside selfie Stewart posted to Instagram in 2019 caught the comedian's eye (per Insider). That thirst trap prompted an imitation selfie from Handler, as well as a warm and amusing exchange between the two women ("I think my pool is a little bit prettier than yours," quipped Stewart). She has previously admitted on "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" that the selfie had prompted a very enthusiastic response from a number of gentlemen who sent her DMs in response to her now-famous photo. As Martha put it, she received "so many proposals and so many propositions." Weren't any of those tempting enough to lure Stewart out of single-dom? Apparently not, as all those messages went unanswered. Stewart clarified that she "had to ignore all of them. I'm a very busy person" (via Vanity Fair).

We're not sure what Freud would make of all of this, but we're guessing it's not just a lack of opportunity that's keeping Martha from love. But for one lucky gent, Stewart would certainly be the catch of a lifetime! (Snoop Dogg, are you reading this?)