We Finally Know What Doritos' Illuminati Tweet Meant

Doritos is the ultimate gamer snack food, according to BANKNOTES, or at least that's the cliché, according to GameFAQs. And gamers, per Lifehack, are scientifically proven to be smarter than non-gamers or at the very least, research shows gaming increases intelligence. Therefore, by virtue of the transitive property, Doritos must be for smart people, right? If not, then why else would Doritos' marketing seem to be growing more intellectual by the day? 

Seriously, have you seen Doritos' social media these last few days? First, there was the tweet that asked the intellectually provocative question, "are you ready to see the world differently? 8.24.22." The cryptic imagery that accompanied that tweet; to wit, a video that opens with the image of an Egyptian pyramid that seems to glow, then a drawing of the "Eye of Power," a symbol that depicts an eye inside a triangle and is frequently associated with the Illuminati, and finally a glowing triangular Dorito chip. The next day, rather than shedding light, Doritos tweeted another cryptic message — "The triangles...they're speaking to me. 8.24.22," accompanied by a video that looks like David Lynch might have had a hand in designing its aesthetic. It starts with a garishly glowing triangular yield sign, proceeds to a fully loaded triangular billiards rack, and closes in the same way as the other video, with a glowing triangular Dorito. 

So many questions, so few answers. On August 24, however, it all became clear what these cryptic tweets mean.

Doritos wants you to admire its shape

Before we get to the meaning of Doritos' Illuminati-themed tweets, perhaps we should point out that Doritos' curious skew into the cryptic isn't exactly a new development. We've seen it coming for a while, including the time Doritos hinted at a new flavor, leaving Twitter desperate for answers. In that instance, Doritos was kind enough not to leave Twitter hanging for too long. The very next day, Doritos tweeted that it had launched two condiment-like flavors. In this instance, however, Doritos has taken a different tactic. Instead of revealing the answer on Twitter, it has revealed the answer to us in the form of a press release, leaving the task of informing the world to us. 

The press release reports that all that triangle imagery is meant to remind us that Doritos are triangular, triangles are everywhere, and therefore, by the transitive property, if you look hard enough (i.e., the eye in a triangle), you'll see Doritos everywhere you look, or at least everywhere you see triangles. And to prove its logic, Doritos is putting its money where the triangles are. As of August 24, 2022 (i.e., "8.24.22," which appears in both tweets), interested parties can participate in Doritos' latest interactive campaign that promises prizes of up to $250,000 cash. Although gamers will feel right at home, the Doritos "Triangle Tracker" is meant for everyone. All of the relevant details can be found on Doritos' Triangle Tracker webpage.